Picking up girls!

Ha! A friend of mine asked me today if learning to play golf was a good way to pick up girls!...

I suppose that anything you do with enthusiasm can net you a girlfriend if you have mad game...but I digress---

I have noticed a few things about the driving range recently. Let me list them for you and then YOU can decide for yourself what the social implications are in the realm of matchmaking:

1. Most women at the driving range don't want you to watch them swing


2. Most men at the driving range don't want you to watch them swing


3. Therefore no one is looking at anyone

Then we have the next set of issues:

1. Most men at the driving range are dressed like crap (why do you hit balls in jeans guys? Seriously?) and haven't shaved in three days or are sporting the fabulous "ball cap/goatee combo" that was so chic in 1998
2. Most women at the driving range are dressed in matching pink (or purple or green) golf clothes with clean hair and $150 Guess sunglasses
3. Those two things don't match up at all

However since no one is looking at each other anyway, it doesn't matter---so no one ever hooks up.

So who knows huh? Maybe you'll get lucky and find that Natalie Gulbis is slumming and can't resist your 19 handicap charms---maybe she will think that your 80 degree banana slice is adorable and that your 10 year old Oakley Blades are "rad"---and maybe she will cozy up next to you and ask you to help her with her pelvic tilt---

But probably not.

So yes, come and play golf. Join the rest of us tortured souls out on the range and the fairways--and learn that there are worse things in life than being single (like three putting for example) and that the woman of your dreams might be at the driving range--but she will never look at you and you will never look at her---so just accept it.

'Now keep your head down and don't clear your hips too early--

Wait--maybe golf and sex are more alike than I realized!--I just had an idea for a new blog topic...stay tuned!

Peace!

Kit